New Year's "Resolutions"

2011 definitely had its ups and downs.  Our biggest blessing was the arrival of our baby girl and every day with her seems even better than the last.  As with every year I make resolutions but this year I have decided to make goals for 2012, rather than resolutions.  Much like every year, my first goal is lose weight and get in shape, this year however I have a goal weight in mind, am making myself work out 5 days a week and plan on keeping track of what I eat everyday... I weighed myself this morning, ugh, and don't plan on stepping back on the scale until January 31st!
My second goal, learn how to use my sewing machine.  My mom bought me a sewing machine for my birthday a few years back, yes years, and I have yet to make anything except a very lopsided apron that I am not proud of!  I also hope this gives me the creative outlet I have been looking for!
Lastly I need to learn to not compare myself to others and be happy with what i have.  How easily I forget about how blessed I am.  Instead of being thankful that I am able to only part time, I get angry that I cant stay home full time.  This year I plan to count my blessing every night, show my husband how much I love and appreciate him and enjoy all the good times rather than dwell on the hard times.
Did you make goals/resolutions for 2012?  Do you have a game plan to stick to them this year?  Here is to a fun fabulous new year and meeting every goal we made!!
(PS, like the look of the blog?!  Thanks Nikki!!)

When I Grow Up

Some kids want to be astronauts others want to be movie stars, and while exploring space seemed pretty cool and who doesn't want to be rich and famous, I always just wanted to be my mom.  My mom wasn't the "cool" mom who let us stay up all night, she wasn't the mom who spoiled her kids her rotten and she definitely wasn't the mom who let us do whatever we wanted, she was so much better than that. 
My mom was the mom who picked us up from school everyday, asked how our day was and was genuinely interested to find out.  My mom was the mom who made every birthday extremely special.  From carnivals to tea party's, each one was special in its own way.  My mom was the mom who went all out for each and every Holiday.  To this day Christmas is my favorite time of year, not for the gifts, but for time spent with family and looking at my mother's beautiful Christmas decorations.  Her home is truly enchanted this time of year.  My mom was the mom who made us lunches until we graduated high school, even when we told her we no longer at a school.  My mom was the mom who came to every sporting event, sat on the booster club, kept the score at baseball games and worked at the snack shack.  My mom was the mom who was apart of every aspect of our lives, from our first skinned knee to our first crush, she knew everything about us.
My mom was the mom who kissed boo boos, wiped snotty noses, held cold rags to warm foreheads, wiped tears, play boardgames, made crafts, sang to us, danced with us, encouraged us to reach for the stars, made us feel safe, pushed us to get outside our comfort zone, worked hard, played harder, and loved us for who we are. 
Oh how blessed I am to have a mother like mine and how blessed Bell is to have her as a grandmother.  If I can be half the mom for Bellamie that my mom was for me, she will be one lucky girl.   I can only hope I become the mom that Bellamie hopes to be one day when she grows up.

Sometimes mommys need help

My labor wasn't a typical one, if there is such a thing, but thats a story for another day.  My daughter was born with a birth defect, (oh how I hate that word) clubfoot.  Because she was having some breathing problems and a possible infection I was only allowed to hold her for a few precious moments before she was taken to the nursery.  I am sure someone told me, at the time, that she had a clubfoot but I was exhausted after giving birth, as I assume most women are, and fell asleep shortly after.  It wasn't until 3 am, when I woke in a panic, that I told my husband I wanted to see the baby now!  A fainting spell and wheelchair ride later, I was in the nursery looking at my precious baby girl.  She was just perfect even with all the ivs, but gasp, what was wrong with her foot.  With tears in my eyes I looked at my husband and asked what was wrong with her.  "Remember, she was born with a clubfoot?"  No I didn't remember!!  Now dont get me wrong I was incredibily thankful for a healthy baby girl and clubfoot is by no means life threatening, but I was still very upset.  They explained to us that she would have to be put in a cast right away, followed by weekly castings and a surgery.  I was devastated.  And though my family and friends were very supportive, I couldnt help being sad, worried and even a little angry.  But somehow we got through those first two months of long weekly trips to the specialist, though it wasnt always easy.  Fast forward to today and many sleepless nights of googling "clubfoot," " or "how to get your baby to sleep" or "why is my hair falling out" only to find myself mortified at all the horror stories.  I just wanted another mother, who had a child with clubfoot to tell me it will be ok; that if sleeping her in swing helps her sleep, let her sleep; that it was ok that breastfeeding didnt work out for us; that I wasnt a bad mom when I couldnt get her to stop crying so I just cried with her; that it was ok to be angry with my husband over nothing as long as he knew I still loved him at the end of the day... all of this lead to me wanting to create a blog... a blog where mommy's can reach out to other mommys, share their stories, their worries, their heartaches and their happy moments.  I hope by sharing my experiences I can help another mommy, or at least make her smile and I hope others will share their stories too because well mommy may know best but sometimes mommy needs a little help!